Monday, February 14, 2011

Valentine's Day



"MY WIFE"
by John Piper
"God’s first thought, my adolescent dream,
slat-slashing dusty-barn beam
from and to the Sun;
my flesh, myself, my one,
my church in parable, in truth;
my Rachel, my Abigail, my Deborah, my Ruth,
the eyes, the wit, the bravery,
the sweat and loyalty,
my cornucopia, my cluster-laden vine, my tree
my cedar, my ecstasy;
fingers through my forearm on the way,
my pride, my pilgrim, my stay;
alive, alive with every sense,
my first, my last, my hoped-for audience;
knower, mirror, stayer,
elbow to elbow prayer;
my sons’ womb, their food, their milk,
their rock, and even now, their silk;
my feminine, my womanly, my softness,
sweet peace, this silver pillow’s tress;
my daughter’s world, her confidant,
life’s interpretation, direction for the yawning want;
fellow-heir, world’s heir, King’s seed,
co-inhabitant of thrones, compassion canopied;
better than jewels, better than gold,
ever-creating hands, from strands twelve-fold
a woven Gramma’s heart, Heaven-bent,
arch, curve, swell, living interface, sent;
my ransomed, my chosen, my bond,
my second pearl, beyond
the world and all it offers me;
my window, my sky, where I can see
in you my one sure Non-rejection,
anchored affection,
present, for me, without pursuit,
my earthly absolute."



     Today is a good and bittersweet day. I think of good memories, I tip my glass to those who celebrate sweet romance, I cherish God's love, and I wait patiently on the girl He will send me from above.

Happy V-Day,
Russ

Wednesday, February 2, 2011

A New Page of Life

"I'm letting it all sink in. Fresh paper and a nice expensive pen. The past cannot subtract a thing from what I might do for You."  - Therapy (Relient K)

     Top of the morning. I am currently interrupting the mega-posts for a simple update of my life. I wrote a couple weeks ago that monster posts were coming, so for the 1.3 of you who read this blog, you cannot say that you were not forewarned!
     In Donald Miller's latest book, "A Million Miles in a Thousand Years," he chronicles the story of two film producers who approach him with the idea of turning his hit memoir "Blue Like Jazz" into a movie. The story gets painfully humorous, however, when they awkwardly try to hint to him that they are going to have to edit his life a little bit because... well... his life is boring. The book is actually quite profound and moving, to be honest. Ok wow... just talking about Donald Miller and I'm already starting to write like him again... Anyways, he ends up attending a story-writing seminar and the whole book is about how he begins to think that possibly the same elements that go into making a memorable story can be applied to making a memorable life. And then he begins to not only write, but to actually tell stories with his life. He goes on a mission to find his father. He decides to get in shape and go on a mountain-climbing excursion. He asks out  a cute girl and as their relationship progresses, he even ends up proposing to her. He creates a program for fatherless children and teenagers, called "The Mentoring Project," which becomes funded and eventually endorsed on a national level by President Obama. In short, he takes the blank pages of his life, and begins to tell a better story.
     I am so excited about all that I feel God is doing in my life. But over the past few weeks and even months I've thought over taking the next step in the story God has given me. I have been humbled and thankful for the management job God has given me at the Buckle and the core leadership position He has entrusted to me at the Bridge, neither of which I deserve, and yet I have felt very frustrated over the past couple years. Number one, because I feel like I don't have a second to breathe. Part of this, I am sure, is due to my own lack of time management and discipline, but I have no real days off and with all the busyness of my schedule, sometimes I just feel like I'm running in circles. Which is number two - the fact that as I try to give one hundred and ten percent to the Buckle and the Bridge, I feel like I end up doing neither. And so after a couple of months of thinking and praying and petitioning for wisdom from a select few, I did something kind of crazy on Monday. I stepped down from management and full-time at the Buckle. Yes, I purposely just cut my salary in more than half and stripped myself of benefits and health insurance. Am I an idiot? Probably. Am I worried? Not hardly. Am I excited? Uncontrollably.
     As of March, I will be working a couple days a week at the Buckle, a couple days a week at the Bridge, and a couple days a week for my sister's marketing and cost-recovery business, a business that is doing extremely well and in which I can make my own hours. There are so many ideas and so forth that I am excited about that I can hardly sit still. But as I make room for a job that could actually make me a lot more money, as I free up my schedule to have some breathing time and gym time and friends and family time, and as I most importantly dive head-first into what I moved up here for in the first place, I can't help but feel the reassuring hand of God. And that fills me with hope and strength. No matter what happens, I love Him and trust Him.
     It just feels right to tell a new story. I feel His hope in my veins. And I can't wait.