2011: A Year to Live on Purpose

"A long December and there's reason to believe maybe this year will be better than the last..."
                              

     Near the end of middle school a friend warned me that once I hit senior high, each year would fly by progressively faster than the last, and that this pattern would continue beyond that through most of the rest of life. She was right.
     I think it is both the grace of God and the comfort of man to have time cultivated and divided up and organized the way it is. And where we often neglect to reflect as deeply and frequently as we should, markers of time like a "new year" serve to help remind us. About life. Priorities. The winds of change.
     Milton once remarked that God has given us the alternating of day and night for the reason of providing us with a "grateful vicissitude." This sometimes painful, but refreshing change - this inevitability of transitioning seasons - seems to be one of life's only constants.
     In my brief time so far on earth, I already feel as though I have brushed against a full gamut of human experience. I have laughed until I couldn't breathe and cried until I couldn't sleep. I have loved so deeply at the altar of romance I thought I might die at its steps. I have also in the same breath had my heart  succinctly and definitively broken, as crisp and thorough as a bone cracked against stone. I have been in despair with doubt, and in near ecstasy in conscious spiritual experience with God. There is the sense of which I have a great Odyssey-like world yet to explore on earth, and yet know that I long for my eternal home. There is much yet to learn and yet nothing new under the sun. Life is an odd, broken, and beautiful ride. And one that is passing by fast. Too fast.


"I can't remember all the times I tried to tell myself to hold on to these moments as they pass..."


     I am a sucker for sentiment, to be sure, and on this eve of new year's eve, it is my tradition to yield to nostalgia utterly and completely. And so this afternoon I grabbed a scarf and a salted caramel hot chocolate espresso and sat outside of Starbucks with a dear friend to reminisce on the year and hammer down some new year's resolutions. First, the year...
     Without a doubt, the fastest year of my life to ever fly by. I don't even really know what to think of it. I remained for the fourth year at the same job, which though I enjoy, has its ups and downs just like any other. It was also a transitional year in the job, in which I have had three different managers in the course of this one year. Overall, a cup-slightly-full year at work.
     Romantically... well, this will be a brief paragraph. I am still single, which I think ironically my friends probably think about more than I do. Singleness and marriage both have their pros and cons - or so I am told - and to be honest, I am not itchy to leave the land in which I now dwell. I am still a hopeless romantic to be sure and would love to marry sometime in the next few years, but I am in no rush. Nor would it help things out if I were.
     Things at the Bridge have been amazing. In February we purchased, renovated, and moved into our first permanent location which was amazing for many obvious reasons. We celebrated our one-year anniversary in March. Many pages could be devoted to what God has done at the church - from the beginnings and growths of the African refugee ministry to many great sermon series and baptismal services. Ministries have been birthed and lives changed forever. For me personally at the Bridge, though I have many things to work on and grow in, I finally over the course of this year have begun to feel comfortable in my own skin, so to speak, as far as my department at the church goes. I've been able to work a little smoother in some places, small groups have grown in width as well as depth, I have felt more direction in leadership, have been humbled to be able to preach on many occasions, dream big on some "Converge" events, and many other blessings that have made ministry this time around seem much more fruitful. More than any of that, though, has been the blessing of growing spiritually. During the course of this year, I have for the first time since I have been up here, begun to wholeheartedly and proactively chase after the heart of God again in a real way. That is exciting to finally be able to profess, while at the same time somewhat shameful, since I have been in ministry for a while now.
     Some other miscellaneous accomplishments have colored the year. Though not consistently like I want to, I had certain seasons in which I made progress in the gym. I made a long-overdue call of apology. I read some Dave Ramsey and got my financial house in order, with emergency funds, envelope systems, and destroying credit cards and paying off all debt  (minus a couple furniture payments). I started another book project - which I need to finish. I have become much more consistent in my devotional life. I moved into a much more appreciated apartment.
     Certain highlight moments stand out vividly against the backdrop of 2010. Being in South Carolina for a week to help Colt out as best man in one of the greatest weddings I've ever been to. Hanging out in Charleston as groomsmen in Cody and Amber's extremely special wedding. Certain sacred moments of fun and serenity with friends throughout the year. Irreplaceable moments with God. Spending time at Disney World in October with my sister, niece, and parents. Finding some new favorite authors and rediscovering some old ones. Kentucky road trip with Pastor. New AVA album. Dan came home. Ray's wedding. Friend Day at the Bridge. Weekend visits from all the out-of-towners. Two Angels & Airwaves concerts. Avatar in 3D. Meeting Donald Miller. LOST nights at the Casey's. The thought that on last year's new year's resolutions list, I wrote down that I wanted to find a way to go to California by year's end - and then my dad calls in early spring and asks if I want to take a family trip to San Francisco in June. Yosemite, Alcatraz, Big Sur, Golden Gate Bridge, Ocean Beach, etc... what a time it was. God, thank You for this year You have given me. It is much too easy to forget that every breath and every moment has been given by You and is a non-reproducable gift. Thank You for 2010.

     And so... my new year's resolutions. I realize many people don't like new year's resolutions. They say if there's something important to get to work on, don't wait until the new year - start now. And that's true. And they say most people hardly ever follow through on their resolutions. And that's probably also true. And yet I love them. On a light-hearted level, I think they're fun to make. Plus I love the feel of new beginnings. I love mondays and a new start and a new to-do list. And the thought of a clean-slate year in which I have a God-given free will to truly give everything I have to dream big, become a better person, follow after Him with all of my heart, impact this world for Christ... why not dream big? Why not plan? Why not get a caffeine buzz and get a little ambitious? And why not take it a step farther and even FOLLOW THROUGH...? Get someone to keep you accountable... why not? I stopped on the way home tonight at Bed, Bath, & Beyond because I had a Christmas gift card there. I will confess I bought too much, but among the unnecessary luxuries I bought a picture frame in which I now have my Resolutions List. I am going to hang it on my wall right next to this computer and do something crazy - I am going to go after them! Here is some that made the list:

1) Gym - at least 3 times a week, except for vacation/missions/fast weeks
2) Go sky-diving
3) Remain debt-free and financially organized while increasing focused investing and giving
4) Read systematically through the Bible twice
5) Better sleep patterns - more sleep and the discipline of rising early again
6) Finish 2 of my books
7) Learn how to cook better
8) Become car-efficient
9) Keep room and car clean on weekly basis
10) Stay organized and on-top with less procrastination
11) Be proactively more joyful and relaxed
12) Consistently eat well - no more than 2 cheat meals a week
13) Read every Tozer book there is and more Christian classics
14) Blog or journal at least once a week
15) Participate in something outdoors - event, recreation, sporting - at least once a month
16) To have grown and deepened the Discipleship department
17) To run a marathon
18) To obey God no matter what and have a consistent, thriving, powerful prayer life

    All in all, I wrote 30 resolutions for the year and on the back wrote down 7 specific prayers for the year. These I will keep to the privacy of paper. Let's remember and give thanks for 2010. And with the grace of God let's live life on purpose in 2011.

Here's to the new year,
Russ